Finally!

A Home Depot story worth blogging about!


Sunday night, I was working at a register that was adjacent to a soda cooler with various drinks for sale - coke, diet coke, sprite, lemonade, energy drinks, and so on.

As I'm working through my line of customers, the next customer turns out to be an Asian lady with no merchandise in plain view. I greet her expectantly.

Me: "How're you doing, ma'am?"
Her: (In a thick Asian accent) "Hi, I'd like to buy some lemonade."
Me: "Lemonade?"
Her: (nodding) Yes.

I'm trying to think this through in my head. Lemonade. Surely she couldn't be so oblivious as to not see the huge soda cooler behind her, in plain view of the line she was standing in a minute ago. So why is she asking for lemonade? Does she want a whole bunch of it, even more than what's in the cooler?

These types of thoughts were going through my head, as I visibly contorted my face in an attempt to figure it all out.

I continued:

Me: Lemonade???
Her: (still nodding)

Wondering if I'm misunderstanding her, and reluctant to make a fool of myself by saying that there was some behind her, I tried to think what Home Depot could possibly sell that sounded like "lemonade".

I decided to make a fool of myself.

I pointed towards the cooler behind her, and began to say:

"We have some over there..."

But before I was able to finish my semi-coherent thought, a customer behind the lady had a brilliant thought.

"Laminate?" he suggested.

Her: Yes, "lamonade".

(My proverbial language-barrier light finally goes on...)

Me: Ohhh, laminate flooring?
Her: (nodding vigorously now) Yes!


Sigh. I hope there's an equally prestigious place in Heaven next to those who give food to the hungry and give drink to the thirsty for those who give a clue to the clueless. I'm a natural at that.

A Joke...

...That I made up:



Q. How many fish did the singer catch?


A. Tenor twelve bass.