Thursday, September 22, 2005

Essay? What Essay?

Yeah, so, as always, I leave things to the last minute.

I've known I had a 3 page essay due today (It's past 1 AM right now, Thursday morning) for several days now.

So I figured I had better take a look at the prompt and get around to writing it pretty soon, seeing as how it's due in 10 hours, and I'll need to sleep for at least 6 of those hours, and spend a few more of those hours driving and vainly attempting to find a parking spot in the "parking" (And I use the term loosely) lot at CSULB.

So lo and behold, I crank out a three-page essay which takes me a grand total of about 30 minutes. This is surprising for me at least because I had no idea what I was supposed to write about until I looked up the prompt online, and I even spent some of that time looking up quotes for a movie we had to write about. (The movie is entitled, "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum", which is a hilarious movie made in 1966, which also happens to be quite sexual and dirty, unfortuntately. But besides that fact, the dialogue and characters are brilliant and it was a lot of fun.) The essay was about how the movie and also a play which I mentioned in my last blog, "The Braggart Soldier", are self-referential, among other things. I dunno, I wrote it in 30 minutes, I didn't have a lot of time to memorize the prompt.

Yeah, so being an English major at CSULB rocks, as long as you a) get there before the cars in the parking lot are so tightly packed together that they are stacked on top of each other, and b) you don't get stuck in traffic.

Today, a drive to school that normally takes about 25 minutes took 55 minutes because there was a completely isolated accident in the carpool lane on the northbound 405 freeway, the side I was on. Not only was our traffic stop-and-go, but the other southbound lane was slowing down and becoming bumper-to-bumper, even though the accident wasn't even on their side! So basically, thanks to everyone killing their cats, traffic was completely slowed down so these curious *coughnosycough* people could absentmindedly gawk at an accident that didn't appear to be more than a fender bender.

And of course, as soon as I passed the accident, traffic speed went from 15 MPH-30 MPH to 65+ MPH. It's amazing what idiotic gawking can do to a perfectly good freeway.

Reminds me of people who don't have the multi-tasking skills necessary to drive and maintain their speed and stay at or slightly above the speed limit while yakking on their cell phones about who cares what. I honestly don't understand how some people cannot have the basic foot-mouth coordination necessary to keep their lead foot pressed on the gas while at the same time talk about how Aunt Sally's cookies don't taste as good since she moved next to the pet cemetery. I don't care. Seriously. Are they so caught up in listening to their own voice that all other bodily tasks cease to function? I really don't get it. If you can't handle talking and driving at the same time, if idle chatter takes up such a substantial portion of your mind that you can't pay attention to what is going on around you, do us all a favor and either hang up your phone and throw it out the window or sell your car and burn your license.

Yeah, I'm tired and I spent too much time on the road today. I'm going to bed. More sarcastic blogs on the way...

No comments: